Are You Afraid of Being Disappointed?
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Read More3 Reasons Why Stepping Out Beyond Your Fears Is Worth The Risk
. Have you ever stood on the edge of a cliff and wondered what it would be like to fly? . I mean like – take a leap and sour out over the valley? . . I have an almost insatiable thirst to fly. It’s apparently why I hike to the edge of cliffs why I like to drive moving trucks across the country and why I’m an entrepreneur . I once said to a counselor, “I don’t live by fear.“ She gave me a condescending look of doubt and disbelief. I promptly fired her!! . It’s not that I don’t feel fear. It’s more that I refuse to allow it to control my life. I refuse to be stopped by it. . I today’s article, I’d like to help you do the same. . If you prefer to LISTEN rather than READ, then here’s your MP3: Enjoy! http://www.louannstropoli.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Beyond-Fears.mp3 . . Here’s 3 reasons why stepping out beyond our fears is worth the risk. . . 1) It teaches our brains a new definition of fear. . . . See – fear exists in the brain… not in real life. Fear is a made up ‘reality’ It’s our brain’s way of keeping us out of danger. Depending on each brain’s interpretation of danger – fear looks differently. . . This is why some people are afraid of heights and others aren’t. The height differential is the same. What the individual brain sees and registers in each person is what makes the difference. . , I honestly had a BIG fear that my crowd funding campaign would be a total flop. * My family is now in heaven * I’m still developing entrepreneurial venture partners for my business. * Many friends don’t understand what I’m doing. * Who else in this economy is going to help little ole me? . What if it failed while the world was watching? * What would that do to my business? * How would that effect my efforts to attract the right clients and partners? * What would this do to all the progress I’ve made emotionally and in my ability to re-frame the difficult past experiences of my life? . I had a choice to make: a) step out and and risk it all or b) give in to the fear and stay slumped down in a corner . I chose to step out! . By stepping out I helped my brain to learn that flopping publicly does not equal being eaten alive by a large animal and that I and my business would be just fine no matter the outcome. . I took the risk and I’m so glad I did. . . . 2) It teaches us that ‘NO’ is ‘YES’. . . Darren Hardy, my business mentor, says this: “Go out there and fail as much as possible!” . . As a real estate agent, Darren would knock on doors every work day until he had 50 nos. He would actually mark them off on a chart!!! . He got pretty used to hearing no and he developed a strong resistance to rejection. . During my campaign I had to be very courageous. It wasn’t enough to post photos and pleas on Social Media. . I had to email our community and contact personal and entrepreneurial friends. It’s a scary thing to contact people personally and ask for help. . I kept hearing my mentor in my head: “Go out there and get as many ‘no’s as possible. Eventually you’ll learn to like it.” . Did I hear ‘No’s?...
Read MoreHow to Forgive and Release Before Your Body is Dead
You’ve heard that saying, “I’ll forgive her – over my dead body!!” . The sad thing: that lack of forgiveness is actually moving that person to a dead body more quickly. . I suppose it does hasten the forgiveness. I declare it right now, however: There’s a better way!!! First – remember what we talked about the last two weeks: . Last week – we replaced the word forgiveness with the word release (click here to read/listen to it). . Two weeks ago we discussed 4 lies that we attach to forgiveness that actually keep us from obtaining this freedom (click here to read/listen to it). . Today I invite you to consider one truth about forgiveness/release. I will also offer you three methods that will help you forgive – before your body is dead. . If you prefer to listen, simply click the arrow in the sound track below. http://www.louannstropoli.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Forgiveness_Before_Dead_Body_7_15.mp3 . The One truth about Forgiveness is this: Forgiveness is a gift!. . “Yeah“, someone heckles from the audience, “for the person who gets it.“ . OK – Fair enough. The person who has been forgiven does get a pretty cool gift. What I mean, however, if that forgiveness is a gift for you! . Unforgiveness is a cancer. It eats away at your soul and your spirit. . It grows within you so fast that you soon can’t recognize the person it’s made you to be. The results show up not only in our countenance and spirit but the hatred invites disease in our physical bodies. . The person who holds onto unforgiveness does all these terrible things to him/herself. Meanwhile, the unforgiven person goes along his/her merry little way – not caring at all. . See – unforgiveness does nothing to bring about justice or right a wrong. It simply gives the other person continued power over us. We continue to be slaves thinking we’re somehow winning a battle over the offender. Truth is – the offenders are winning. . Mahatma Ghandi said, “The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” . Today – I want to give you the skills to be the strong. In order to do that I will offer you three techniques I use to enable myself to receive this gift called forgiveness. . Those who know my personal story know that this is real in my life. I’m sharing from experience. My mother suspiciously died and my brother sits on my inheritance while I make myself vulnerable through a crowd funding campaign in order to get on my feet. . If these techniques helped me, I believe they will also help you. Glance through them and utilize the ones the suit you best. You can book mark this page in case you need any of the other options at a later date. . 1) Claim Responsibility . Unjust treatment debilitates us because we feel like we lose power in our lives. . What am I to do with my sudden job loss? Oh great – now everybody is believing that slanderous lie that Lisa is spreading about me. . Here’s a quote from one of mentors, Darren Hardy: “You are – at all times – 100% responsible for your life. You have ownership of changing any situation into a positive. You have full control at all times.” . So – when my last non-profit job ended with a 3 day notice with no unemployment, no savings, and no family support….. I had to say to myself, . “None of this was what I expected and...
Read MoreForget Forgiveness!
. Having trouble with forgiveness? No problem. You’re not alone! Here’s Your solution: Forget About It! You read that right. Forget Forgiveness! There! I said it! . . Forget forgiveness?? What on earth?!?!?! . Ok – Ok – just hear me out – just for a moment. . Speaking of hearing me out – Here’s an MP3 in case you prefer to listen. http://www.louannstropoli.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/07/Forget_Forgiveness.mp3 . . Ok – back to reading… If you read last week’s article (click here to view it) then you are aware of my interpretation of the four lies we believe about forgiveness. Those lies hold us back from creating the freedom we deserve and desire. . It’s my belief that the word ‘forgiveness’ has all these associations (lies) tied to it in our hearts and minds. . We don’t really understand it anymore You know – kind of like the words ‘friend’ and ‘love’. Our definitions are a bit mixed up. . Because of that – when we hear the word, forgiveness, our spirits, our bodies, our subconscious, and our conscious minds get all messed up. We tense up. We say yes to forgiveness with our mouths but the rest of us puts up such a fight that 5 years down the road we’re still stuck. . Here’s my solution: Instead of the word ‘forgiveness’ I use the word ‘release‘. . Here’s what I mean.. When I say I forgive someone I mean these three things: . 1) I release that person from my grip of vengeance. . Now the truth is – I’m Italian. 1/2 Sicilian and 1/2 Calabrese. I can do revenge… I can do revenge real good and for a looonnng time. . But – when I forgive someone – I make a conscious choice to release that person from the threat of my personal revenge. . 2) I release that person into the grip of my higher power. . We have people of all positions of faith and non-faith in our community. Perhaps you have some idea of a power that is higher than yourself. Perhaps you believe in the laws of karma, energy, or the universe. Perhaps you believe in God, Allah, Brahman, or some other expression. . No matter what that is for you. Do you believe that an injustice will be taken care of in some way at some time? . I’ve been through a TON of injustice in my life. I have not personally seen justice acted out for most of those situations. . I do, however, have to trust at if retribution is supposed to happen, then at the right time it will. . I also have to understand that I am not the one to act on that – in most cases. . Now I have to make a few clarifications: . First: Should all honorable forces on the earth fight against injustice such as the Holocaust, the Khmer Rouge, and Isis? YES! I believe we should fight against these forces. We cannot sit idly by and watch others be brutally killed. . When I say that I’m not the one to bring about justice, I’m not necessarily referring to large scale social injustices that must be halted with a large scale response. I believe that we should and indeed MUST act collectively on behalf of others who need our help. . . Second: Should we address slander or wrongful acts against us? Should we confront abuse and violations? Yes, of course. We should represent ourselves honorably and seek to gain back what has been taken from us. . There is a difference, however,...
Read MoreLoving Ourselves – Why so Difficult?
Welcome!! . So the last couple of weeks we’ve been talking about Loving Ourselves, which I wrote about in the newly released #1 Amazon Best Seller: The Energy of Expansion. http://amzn.to/1xm9k59 . . The more comments I receive, the more I learn that this really is a challenging topic for us. . Either we simply don’t think we are supposed to love ourselves (we’ve been taught that that’s arrogant) or don’t know how (we are wounded in this area). . As a result, we’re going to continue learning together about how to increase our self-love. . Today’s post is a simple list with very little commentary. Be sure to add your perspective and your expertise in the comments. Please add to the list too! . It appears we could all use all the help we can get in this area. . Here Goes! 1. Be Thankful for You (Make a list, Post it, Read it Out Loud) (the creation of you, your body, your intellect, your gifts) . 2. Be Thankful for The People in Your Life (Make a list) (aside from blood relatives, the rest were your choice) . 3. Make a list of things you like about Yourself. (Make a list, Post it, Read it Out Loud) (Anything and everything that you like!!) . 4. Make of list of things you don’t like about Yourself. (It’s probably smaller than you think – once you actually write it down.) . 5. Make a plan to change one of those things you don’t like. (Just take one small step in the right direction – and then another – ) . 5. Do Something nice for Yourself. ( buy flowers, get a massage or pedicure, get a new hair style) . 6. Do something New and Scary. (Developing our courage makes us stronger. That can increase our self-appreciation) . 7. Forgive (Forgiveness is a gift for YOU. It gets those bad people out of your head) . 8. Reduce/Eliminate Toxic Relationships (If folks are dragging you down, it’s ok to create some space between you and them.) . 9. If Spiritual, read what your holy text says about your uniqueness and giftedness. ( You were created with love, uniqueness, & purpose ) . 10. Take a class ( Learning something new gives us increased confidence and excitement) . 11. Set a new Goal ( Funks are created by being stuck in the past. Set a new goal and work towards it and you won’t have time for that funk.) . 12. Exercise on a Regular Basis ( endorphins, strength, accomplishment all help in our self-love) . 13. Identify The Root of those Limiting Thoughts ( It’s 99.9% likely that your present limiting thoughts are rooted in something you heard said or said about you at a previous point in your life. Identify it. Name it. Release it.) . 14. Get some time alone. (Learning to love our own company will create a life of joy and bliss no matter who comes and goes. ) . 15. Celebrate!! (Celebrate your accomplishment or simply just who are you – don’t wait for others to do this for you.) . 16. Look in the Mirror!! (I mean really look. Look at the cool shape of your eyes and the color. Look at the way your neck curves into your shoulders. You have to admit – your human body is very cool!) . 17. Spend time in Your Favorite Place (a nearby pond, the ocean, a park, your backyard ) . 18. Make a list of those you help care for. (Your kids,...
Read MoreHow to Expand Your Love of Life
I’m excited to be writing this post just shy of the launch of our new book, The Energy of Expansion. The book explores how we expand our experience in life. It’s filled with perspectives from 22 authors. You will enjoy a rich variety of perspectives. . When I was asked to think about my own life and the expansion I’ve experienced, my mind immediately drew a comparison to those dark lonely days 7 years ago (referred to in my last post) compared to where I am today. . The difference in how my life looks and how I feel is a magnificent testimony that we are truly never stuck – no matter how bad things may seem. . As I reflected on the changes in my life that expanded my joy and opportunities – two principles stood out. 1) I needed to learn to love myself more 2) I needed to learn to believe in myself . This week we’ll explore self-love. Here’s 9 reasons why loving ourselves is so important. I’m relying on you for #10. . 1) Loving ourselves acknowledges that we’ve been created with magnificence and purpose. . If we believe this is true, then loving ourselves is simply loving our creator and the magnificence behind the intelligent purposeful design that has brought us into being. . 2) Loving ourselves improves our relationships and intimacy. . Having close intimate relationships requires a level of security and trust. It takes great courage to choose to be truly close – living together as life-partners bearing our hearts and our souls and sharing our bodies. Loving ourselves is the only way to truly open up to loving another person with this level of vulnerability. . 3) Loving ourselves helps us set proper boundaries for our mental and physical health. . We all know that exercise is important. We also know that it’s important to say no from time to time. If we fail to love ourselves, we will put these important aspects of life aside. The end result can be catastrophic. . 4) Loving ourselves improves our confidence. . Have you ever noticed that people who don’t love themselves tend to want to push others down and out of the way. People who don’t truly love themselves and their unique set of gifts tend to be threatened by others who appear more confident. The only cure for the insecurity disease is to learn to love who we are and all that we bring to this wonderful table called life. . 5) Loving ourselves causes us to fall in love with our lives. . Have you ever noticed how everything is delightful when you are in love? Well, loving ourselves has that same effect. Love begets love. It’s as simple as that and it’s super super fun! . 6) Loving ourselves helps us set and reach our goals. . Do you remember that video series Promises -2-Goals? We explored how making promises to ourselves is much more powerful and intimate than simply setting goals. The promises I made to myself this year were made because I love and care for myself and want something better. If I didn’t love myself, then the overall quality of my life and the desire to achieve my very highest opportunity would not matter to me. I know this is true because I used to not love myself. Loving ourselves changes everything. . 7) Loving ourselves helps us in those dark times when others don’t show us love. . I recently went through a rather brutal experience with someone I trusted. Back in the day...
Read MoreMeditation Made Fast, Easy, and Effective
Have you ever been freaked out by meditation? It’s too long, it’s too weird, it opens you up to strange influences. . Well, if you’ve ever had those fears, fear no more. We’ve made mediation fast, easy, normal, and effective. . AND – it even retrains your brain paths so you can stop getting stuck and live the life you desire. . In this video I explain a little about mediation and then guide you through a 5 minute exercise. The actual meditation starts at 7:17. . Enjoy! See you on the other side. I look forward to your comments. Always remember: Be Inspired! Be Inspirational! Be a Leader! You’re changing someone’s life simply by being you. See you in the comments! Don’t forget to subscribe! When you do, you’ll receive special tips, resources, and personal anecdotes reserved only for our community! Disclaimer: LouAnn is not a doctor, psychiatrist, or a neuroscientist. She is simply one person who has been helped who is now desiring help others. Results of learning to train our subconscious minds will vary and are dependent on many personal factors including how much we practice and focus on changing our focus. OK – now with that out of the way – let’s get back to being focused on inspiring and leading ourselves and those in our circles as we take back control of our subconscious! 🙂...
Read MoreMaster Your Subconcious: Part 1
In recent posts we’ve talked about creating consistency as a way to achieve our goals, move forward in life, and experience victory in the areas where we struggle. Those posts include: Consistency and How to Create Consistency. The truth, however, is that sometimes creating consistency is not enough. We think we can will ourselves into change. We try. We stumble. We backslide. Well, there’s an answer. Today we’re going to begin a little journey that will take us beyond the surface of our habits and into the depths of our internal engine. The beliefs and memories that influence us the most reside far beneath the conscious levels of our brain. . As it turns out 90-95% of our behaviors and core beliefs are programmed in our subconscious minds! . That’s HUGE!!!! . That means that while we’re creating outside influences in our lives (like the 6 keys to consistency) we must also work on re-forming our subconscious. This is the only way we will be able to truly live the life we desire. None of us has had a perfect life. That means – that none of us has a perfectly healthy subconscious. That means – that we can all benefit from a little maintenance. . My research and simultaneous work on my own subconscious is literally changing my life – for the better! . I want to share what I’ve learned with you. So you know where we’re headed, the topics in this next month or two will include (not in any particular order): Understanding & Retraining your Reticular Activating System (RAS) Creating your focus Meditating your way to peace Visualizing your victory Believing your way beyond your limitations Rewiring your brain paths Re-framing your way to success . Ok – for today: 1) Pinpoint an area of your life which is causing you some resistance. . 2) Write it down. . 3) Share your area in the comments section below. I bet you’ll find you have company. . 4) Also in the comments section below, share the questions/concerns that you have about your subconscious. I’m excited for our little journey! . All Aboard!! Continue to Remember: Be Inspired! Be Inspirational! Be a Leader! You’re changing someone’s life simply by being you! . . PS If you’re not yet subscribed, sign up now! This way I’ll be able to email you when the next chapter of our journey is posted and ready. . I don’t spam and I’ll never give or sell your email address to anyone! That’s a promise I stand by! . Join our Inspirational Leading Family. We’re changing lives together. ...
Read MoreSuicide – What to do?
Last week I shared with you some of the beauty I found all across this country on my cross-country trip. If you missed that post you’ll find it here: This week I was going to share the second leadership lesson I learned along the way. With the events of the past week, however, my heart has leaned in a different direction. I’ve seen and experienced so many responses and reactions to the news of the death of Robin Williams. Some interactions have been incredibly uplifting and others – well – not so much. What I’ve noticed most of all is our cumulative limited understanding of bipolar disease and severe depression. It’s not our fault. We’re doing the best we can. But the truth is – we’re lost, roaming in a maze when it comes to understanding the fog our depressed friends carry. Sometimes we try to prescribe our version of meds. If only the person who is depressed would: Believe in his/her purpose in life Believe in a higher power Just trust more in faith Take the right meds Repeat the right mantra Resolve his/her demons from the past Exercise more to ignite enough endorphins to replace the sadness While it may be true that some of these things (alone or combined) may help the depressed person, none of these things is the whole answer. What is the whole answer? Honestly – I don’t think we know. I don’t think we know the answer. I don’t think we fully understand the complex nature of this disease. It’s only in recent years that we’ve started to make headway on the discoveries of neuroscience: How do our conscious and subconscious interact? How does our focus actually determine the direction of our lives? How does meditation work to calm the mind and body? The thing is – the brain is the most complicated part of the body. In all of our magnificence, in all of our knowledge and skill, we haven’t fully figured out the brain and what causes it do to certain things. We haven’t figured out this horrific disease that causes our friends and family members to end their own earthly lives. Despite our love. Despite how much we know they will be missed. Our depressed fellow travelers can’t comprehend the hole they will leave behind. I lost a friend to suicide when I was 21. That was a long time ago. I can tell you that I still think about him and those tragic events quite often. He thought it wouldn’t matter if he killed himself. He thought no one would care. Well – it mattered a lot. And a lot of us cared and still do. He missed out on an entire life. Why? I can’t really tell you. I can’t tell you because all the reasons above. I can’t tell you what would have changed things for him. There are no easy answers. There are no quick fixes or instant solutions What can we possibly do then? Is there anything besides throwing our hands up in despair? adsfk;adsfja A few things come to mind as places where we can start. They are not the final solution. But maybe just maybe – they will help even if just a little. 1) We can be more compassionate and more patient adsfk;adsfja 2) We can choose to love those who are difficult for us to love adsfk;adsfja 3) We can resist the urge to judge adsfk;adsfja 4) We can stop the fights and the name...
Read MoreTired of Feeling Guilty?
Tired of Feeling Guilty? One would think that while living in 2014 with all our technology empowerment and relational knowledge that we would be able to live without that dragging nagging emotion named GUILT. Guilt rips our insides, causes us to think others are estranged from us, and holds us back from doing what we really want or really need to do. Most often these guilt feelings come when we have been asked to do something for or with someone and we don’t want to. When we say no, we feel guilty. Allow me to offer a different viewpoint however: Saying ‘no’ should not cause us guilt. Saying ‘no’ actually shows respect. How could this be true? Well, think about two scenarios: A) Think about the last time that you asked someone to do a favor for you, or invited her to join you for an event. The response you received was __________ (emptiness). Allow yourself to feel those LONG moments when you were waiting for a reply. Don’t read on yet. Do you remember that feeling? Do you feel it now? B) Now think of another situation when you have made a similar request. Instead of nothingness, you received a very nice reply that indicated that the person was not able to help or join you at that time. No reason was needed nor given. It doesn’t matter. The point is: she took a moment to give you a response. Allow yourself to feel that moment when you heard a ‘no’ but felt respected and cared for because the person took the time to respond. Which felt better? If you’re like me, it always feels better to receive a ‘no’ rather than receiving nothing. Why? Well, even if it isn’t in our conscious mind, when we respond to others we acknowledge that person’s presence. We understand the underlying value of our fellow human not only in our personal life, but also in the totality of our shared identity. Remember when we talked about why identity matters? Click here for a reminder. When people say ‘no’ to us, they show us respect by spending time and courage to respond. Who doesn’t like to be respected? When you receive a ‘no’ from someone you can then move on to look for your ‘yes’ from someone else. Hearing no allow us to stop wasting time waiting for the response. Remember from last week’s post: when we hear ‘no’, what do we say? Find Out Here! So don’t be afraid to say ‘no’. Guilt is an emotion we choose to hold. Instead, choose to believe the truth that when you say ‘no’ you are demonstrating respect for another person rather than putting them in a position to wait in nothingness or even worse….having to ask again. Go ahead, say ‘no’ and show respect! You’ll feel free and so will the other person. What are you thoughts? Does hearing ‘no’ help you to feel respected? Share your response in the comments section. Don’t forget to bring along a friend to receive and share inspiration! Share this post or simply send your friend an email invite. If you haven’t yet subscribed, join us now! We’re growing each and every day and we welcome your presence in our Inspirational Leading Community. Always remember: Be Inspired! Be Inspirational! Be a Leader! ...
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